I’m still working on catching up on here, but I’m starting to feel like I’m at least getting close! Mother’s Day might have been over a month ago, but with how fast the days are flying by, it feels like yesterday.
I always experience a plethora of emotions on Mother’s Day. I have so many amazing women in my life who have helped make me who I am today, and I’m so grateful for them. I miss being with my own mom and my mom-in-law and being able to celebrate them in person. And, as I remember the days before I was a mom, I feel remnants of the pain of not knowing whether or not I even should be one. Now, I am blessed to have the most amazing baby girls, but I cry because I often feel undeserving of them. I’m never one who really wants a lot of attention, but celebrating this day means so much to the girls, and their joy is my joy also.
I was very excited to wear our matching outfits to church that day! I remember thinking last year that I couldn’t wait to take a picture with my FOUR girls, and here they are (and Eve is almost a year old already)!
Kaya and Kaelyn made me these sweet cards, and even wrapped them in gift bags with tissue paper. Kaya recorded me opening them on her camera.Kaelyn actually made me an entire book, and she wrote it all on her own! Here are some of my favorite pages:
We never do big gifts on Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, but this year, Michael gave me a weighted blanket, which is something I have wanted for a couple of years. He was a little sneaky and put a note inside of a jewelry box to tell me it was coming in the mail later in the week. He’s the best, and I definitely love this blanket.
They also made me another one of those questionnaire videos that I like so much!
I made my homemade chicken nuggets and potato wedges, while Michael and the girls baked an amazing chocolate cake. And then there was a mysterious knock at the door… (to be continued!)
Now that it’s almost Father’s Day… I figured I should actually post about Mother’s Day!
Honestly, Mother’s Day always brings up a lot of strong emotions for me, mostly because I know that there are so many women who are hurting on this day for various reasons.
Before we had our girls, I used to struggle so much because I truly lacked a testimony of my own divine role as a daughter of God. I looked all around me and saw women who were thriving, seemingly called to raise families. I doubted my ability to be “good enough” to ever mother children at all, so starting our family took a huge amount of faith. I’m not a perfect mom, but I’m trying, and I know now that there’s no such thing as “good enough”. Raising these little girls is what I’m supposed to be doing, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
Of course, I’m also so grateful for all the amazing women, both those who have gone before me and those in my life now, who have set incredible examples for us.
Kaya was so excited and shouted, “It’s Mother’s Day!” as soon as she woke up that morning. Michael surprised everyone with donuts for breakfast, and we headed off to church. I always look forward to hearing stories from other people about the inspirational women in their lives.Kaya and Kaelyn got to go up to the front of the chapel and sing a special Mother’s Day song (“The Dearest Names”). My girls actually didn’t seem to know the words very well, but it was still completely adorable, especially since it was Kaelyn’s first time performing with the Primary! They always run back to our pew with the largest grins, so excited and proud of themselves for going up there at all.Kaya couldn’t wait to surprise me with this HUGE stack of cards… 21 of them, to be exact. She had them all folded and some tied up with yarn, so it was like opening all these little gifts from her. It was fun to unwrap each one while Michael made lunch for everyone.Kaya also made that little handprint in Primary at church. I might just keep it forever. Both girls received these little surveys at church, too. I always love hearing what they think and how they see our everyday life. No surprise, but it seems like the most simple things are usually their favorites (like snuggling)!
Kaya:
This morning Tara was named World’s Best Mom.
My mom loves to eat food with our family.
When she surprises us it makes me really happy.
My favorite thing to do with my mom is snuggle.
My mom is really good at teaching me.
Her very favorite thing about me is my big hugs and cards.
She loves to eat brownies with sprinkles and has really pretty curls.
Her favorite scripture story is Jesus’ birth.
I love her so much because she takes care of me while Daddy is at work.
Kaelyn:
This morning Mama was named World’s Best Mom.
My mom loves to take pictures with our family.
When she snuggles me it makes me really happy.
My favorite thing to do with my mom is spend time with her.
My mom is really good at making necklaces.
Her very favorite thing about me is that I’m a good helper.
She has a really pretty smile.
As if that wasn’t enough fun, we also played some Mario Kart (it’s so exciting that the girls are now old enough for games!) while Michael cooked tacos. I actually ate a taco, which was amazing! He even surprised me with a big bag of dark chocolate raisins, so I had some of those, too.
He took the older girls down to the basement to make one last surprise for me before the night was through- a video questionnaire! Now I can watch their adorable little antics forever and ever, so it’s even better than the paper version. (Sidenote: I love how they both said my favorite food is grilled cheese… it’s mostly all they’ve seen me eat for dinner for the past 6-ish months!)
The very best part of this day was seeing my girls’ excitement about everything. They absolutely love making surprises and showing love to our family. And, I’m looking forward to taking a picture with all FOUR of my little ladies next year!
Michael didn’t have any extra church meetings on Mother’s Day, so we got to start the morning off nice and slowly, with some surprise donuts from my favorite local bakery! He’s getting too good at sneaking out on Saturday evening to buy donuts, and then hiding them until Sunday morning (which he’s done on several holidays for the past few years). However, I think he’s learned not to tell Kaya where he hides them anymore- she’s been a secret-spoiler lately!
Admittedly, I sometimes wish that Mother’s Day would be renamed to something that would be inclusive for all women, because I know how hard this day can feel for so many because of that title (sidenote: there actually is an “International Women’s Day” on March 8th of every year). The reality is, even if someone isn’t a mother by the standard definition, they equally deserve to be honored for their work and righteous, loving influence over others. I have so many amazing women to look up to in my life, and I am so grateful for them.
The best part of the day was hearing the Primary children sing at the front of the chapel during sacrament meeting. Kaya was waving to us for a good part of the performance, all while attempting to remember the words to “I Often Go Walking”. I can’t believe that next year, Kaelyn will be up there with her!
The girls came home from their classes with Rice Krispies treats, but gave them to me, saying, “Because I love you!”, as they handed them over. In truth, they actually don’t like them, but hey, the sentiment was just as sweet, and I can’t pass up free Rice Krispies treats. I love these little girls with my whole heart, and even when we have rough days, I still feel so much gratitude knowing that they are mine. It’s a little crazy, a little wild, and so perfectly imperfect, but I wouldn’t trade my days with these three for anything.Kaya actually did two of these little “my mom” surveys (one at the library and one in her primary class), so I thought I’d condense the answers here. These types of things always make me realize that maybe I’m doing a little better at this job than I tend to think I am.
My mom is… 29 years old. My mom has blue eyes and brown curly hair. (she told me she was making up a pretend mommy for this one) Her favorite flower is… a heart flower. (not sure what this is, but it sounds like something I’d like!) My mom always says I love you. (melt my heart!) My mom makes the BEST pumpkin bread. (currently Kaya’s favorite breakfast) She is SO good at… taking care of me. My mom is funny when she has daddy laugh at her… …and she laughs when I give her a hug. My mom’s favorite color is blue. My mom’s favorite food is pizza. My mom’s favorite game to play is Candy Land. My favorite memory with my mom is going to the store. My mom always forgets to close the van door. (hahaha… so true!) My favorite thing to do with my mom is going to Target.
This year was the best Mother’s Day yet… and it wasn’t because we did anything spectacular or even very out of the ordinary. Mostly, I was overjoyed to see Kaya so excited about celebrating the day. She was absolutely exuberant when all the primary kids went up to the front of the chapel to sing (this song) at church… She was even waving and grinning at us!Both girls made some fingerprint flowers for me in their classes. I love those tiny hands and I’m so glad to have these.Kaya even helped Michael make “square shooter” cookies as a special treat… and then she proudly carried some upstairs to me with a glass of milk right after I took a nap, announcing “Happy Mother’s Day!” as she strolled into the room. We also took a few pictures, because I’m almost always on the other side of the camera, and getting a few pictures with my babies is my one real request every year.I think we ended up with some hilarious candid ones. This is motherhood for real, you guys… With all the hustle and busyness of moving into our home just a few days prior, this low-key day turned out to be perfect.Kaya also did this little survey in Primary, and it’s pretty hilarious and sweet, so I had to include it:
We didn’t really do anything on Mother’s Day this year… but we did take a picture, and that is worth posting!I could write a whole post about everything these two have taught me… the way they love me and test me, fill up my heart and then try my patience. I could list out all my favorite moments or tell you how much it means to me to be a mom to these special spirits.
But today I want to just keep it simple.
I love these two little princesses with my whole being. I usually don’t feel like I even deserve them because they really are that amazing.
I feel blessed, and I’m so grateful for this sacred calling. Even on the tough days, I wouldn’t change a thing.
I know I’m a little late posting about Mother’s Day, but we were out of town spending a fabulous week at the beach, so I’m going to catch-up a little now 🙂
This Mother’s Day was the best yet. I got extra hugs, kisses, and compliments, and just felt a little extra-loved all day long. Kaya didn’t want to take a picture with me, but that’s pretty typical these days. I actually woke up before Michael (which is typical), had breakfast, and started getting ready for the day when he drowsily told me that he had hidden away donuts as a breakfast surprise! Luckily, there’s no law against eating donuts for lunch 🙂
Michael was super sweet and gave me a little at-home pedicure. He actually did a really great job- my toes looked so pretty for our beach trip!
I even got to take a nap, which is something I definitely cherish these days. I’m not sure I’m going to get any sleep at all in just a few weeks when our new little girl gets here! It’s so crazy to think that next Mother’s Day, I’ll be trying to hold two girls in my arms for a picture (although I’m sure Kaya will be running away from the camera by then…)
Day 7 (something beginning with F): First Mother’s Day card- from my mom! 🙂
Day 8 (shape): Hearts, stars, and horseshoes (hopefully I’m not the only one who remembers this commercial from childhood)! I have been pretty obsessed with Lucky Charms lately, so it was only fitting to use them as my “shape” photo.
Day 9 (a snack): A chocolate-chip muffin (my other obsession)!
Day 10 (stars): See that green toy at Kaya’s feet? Yep, I’m counting that for my “star” photo. Although, Kaya is kind of the star of our lives right now, so she could count too!
Day 11 (a smile): Technically I cheated and took this on day 10… but it was just too good to not use!
Day 12 (a mother): Sometimes, I still can’t believe I’m a mom… (probably because I still feel like a kid disguised in an adult body)! But I am so thankful for this little sweetheart and that I get to be her mommy.
Our weekend was one of the laziest we’ve had in a while! It felt good to just watch Netflix, sleep in, and then stay in our jammies.
We might’ve had a lot of dessert, too (I promise that that is not just a bowl of whipped cream… there’s ice cream hiding under there)!
I made chocolate-chip cookies, too! While they were baking, our friends Lauren and Rory stopped by and surprised me with one of the most thoughtful gifts I’ve ever received. They wanted to do something for me since Maggie passed away, so they brought a little stuffed guinea pig. I’m so grateful for amazing friends. We took a couple of “mother’s day” pictures. Kaya was being crazy and we couldn’t get her to smile, but I think this captures the essence of her personality. I’m so grateful I get to be this sweet girl’s mama.Michael helped make and even clean up from dinner (tacos)! It was nice to be able to relax a little.
Kaelyn actually made me an entire book, and she wrote it all on her own! Here are some of my favorite pages:
